“You didn’t listen to your own advice!!” I silently yelled at the book I was reading and then sat silent for a second. Why was I yelling at this book?
I was recently reading Me, Myself, and Bob by Phil Vischer, a story about the creator of VeggieTales, a Christian kids video series. He had a dream to really change the way that media was done for children and create something that had more encouragement and worth for them. His book talks about how they came up with the characters, developed the animation and eventually became very popular. However, several problems that he outlined through the book eventually led to the bankruptcy and selling of the company. He lost not only everything he worked for, but also his dream.
I clearly wasn’t as invested in his dream as he was. Though, to be fair, I do love VeggieTales (His Cheeseburger is still one of my favorite songs of all time!). It took me a minute to put two and two together, but eventually I decided I wasn’t really yelling at the author. I was yelling at me.
I’ve read several stories over the last few years about entrepreneurs- people with crazy big dreams. People who stepped out in very unique ways to do very unique things. Many of them talk about the importance of having a clear, thought out purpose statement that should guide everything you do. And then people will clearly outline what theirs is. But then as you continue through the story, you realize the big holes where they don’t actually do what they set out to do. Where they cut corners. Made seemingly necessary decisions that steered them off course a bit. Sometimes just outright left everything they intended behind for a shiny new opportunity they didn’t expect.
But it’s so much easier to see the holes and weaknesses and tendencies in someone else’s life, then it is your own.
I’ve spent a lot of the last few months reflecting quite a bit. Mostly about how life has taken me in some incredibly different directions then I expected- some unbelievable blessings, and some with awful losses. And at times I’ve very clearly written down all I wanted from life, all I believed for from God, and all I felt He expected of me. But even though it’s so valuable to have a plan and a blueprint for your intentions, even the best-laid plans are not predictors of how it will actually go.
If I’ve learned anything over the last few years, it’s that we can’t hold our dreams in tight fists. We’ve got to hold onto them, or we won’t end up pursuing them at all, but we can’t make them everything. That sounds a bit contradictory, because great things don’t come from half-hearted attempts, or lackadaisical excellence. But great things also don’t come when you’re so busy worried about what’s in your hands that you can’t step back and see all the things that are dripping through your fingers on the way.
I’m re-working this year on re-writing my goals. Making sure I’ve got a big picture outline of where I intend to go that I can come back to again and again and make sure I’m not going crazy off course. But I am also working on re-writing the order of my goals. The ultimate goal should not be the finish line, but the process. And remembering to keep the most important things the main focus, no matter what.